By Jamie Finch
And still I am a child of something more.
Formed and fashioned by and for a storm of wild grace
Unimagined and uncalled for
Scandalously unwarranted and undeserved
For truly I am not my own.
This Love has called me out
Has led me away and swept me up
Oh, to be one with Glory
To know the truth of Light and Life
To come undone in the presence of all that I was intended to be.
But it was the embrace that was shattering after all
Accepted, though not there yet.
I was sought and seen and not found wanting.
You saw it fit to capture my attention and fix my eyes
On the one thing worth everything I am not-
You.
I am because You are and were and will forever be.
Every crippled cause of my own, mistaken to glitter,
Has been graciously wrecked, ravaged, destroyed, and rebuilt
Destroyed and rebuilt.
Recreated to appear a little more like You.
An expected outcome of any encounter
For your beauty intoxicates and swells
Into the deepest part of me and my fragile attempts
At satisfaction.
You are undeniably lovely and I am continually surprised
At how easily I forget this.
How often I stop looking and fix my gaze on something less.
And the longer I am away, the smaller I become.
Until I simply cannot.
Cannot breathe, cannot live, cannot exist
Without You.
You call me Yours and You are mine.
What more is there?
If that does not define, nothing else ever will.
I have been renamed, renewed, restored.
Everything has been made new and now, at last, I see and know
The beauty to be found in my limitations
For you exceed them far greater than I could ever fathom.
And all that is Yours anyway is placed right where it belongs
At Your feet
And in Your hands.
Which is where I find my peace to just rest.
And just be.
To rest and be.
Though condemnation calls out my harlotry
And ever elusive answers tempt me to fear…
Still, I am a child of something more.
And truly, I am not my own.
Nor will I ever be.