By Amanda Petersen
Amanda writes as she prepares to visit Thailand for several months this summer. You can read some background information on her trip here.
I am a month away from Thailand. How does one prepare to go into a place that resembles, perhaps, one of the closest images of hell this world knows? Girls bought and sold, young girls even, all in the name of Mammon and lust? I hesitate to even call it lust. Maybe perversion is a better word.
I am one of those people that is prone to over-educating myself in the way of social issues and human crisis. I am so opposed to naivety that I will search out horrifying accounts of death and destruction of the human spirit, only to retreat in disgust and fear. It is easy for me to become very angry, very easily, when it comes to learning about the stories that many in the world would prefer to close the book on. Im not saying this is a good thing that I do. In fact, I know there has to be a better way of doing life. As my heart desires to share the love and life in Christ, harboring anger and vengeance become counter-productive if my own spirit is destroyed in the process.
All that in mind, something quite beautiful happened the other day. I found myself praying with some of my closest friends, regarding my heart and my upcoming journey. Ben reminded me that I am not going as an advocate or a rescuer, for that is far bigger than any of us know how to tackle at this point. I am going to love. Janeen prayed that my heart would be filled with mercy, paired with the sense of justice that is growing there as well. That as I fall in love with these girls, that I wouldnt fall into hate with the people exploiting them. As Alli prayed, she began to speak reassurance into my purpose in Thailand. I am being promised by God that I am going there to make friends with these girls. He has promised me friendship friendship that gives and receives and laughs together.
I come to the realization that when we love, we love consistently and with fierceness. We love because we are crazy about our brothers and sisters, and desire to show them their value and worth as a precious creation of our Father. The consistency with which we love does not change per person or per situation. It should be no different how often and with what fierceness I care for my white, suburban roommate, as to how I love the young girl in Thailand.
We are always called to love, in different forms at different times. Some love by busting down the filthy doors of brothels and physically rescuing the abused girls. Others love by providing counseling and rehabilitation. It is all so humbling to me to know that right now my role gets to be to love in small ways through sitting, holding hands, painting fingernails, sharing my camera. I have been freed from the burden of hate, into the palm of love. I can let the weight off of my shoulders now. This yoke is lighter.
Amanda is still accepting photography supplies to be used with the girls in Thailand. If you are interested in donating cameras (35mm or digital) or film, please email Amanda at amandapeterson(at)adventures(dot)org. She will respond with proper mailing information.
Amanda Petersen, of the best city in the country, Portland, OR, is an editor for Wrecked, with a passion for photography, writing, reading, and love. She is excited about her on-going nomadic status and seeing how her next bill will get paid.